“General Assembly , Called to reconcile and to be healed !”

Dear sisters and Brothers,
It has been five days I am here in the Assembly and there is a lot of stories I want to share. I am Nina Nayoan from Indonesia and am an outgoing exco member from Asia Pacific region. First, I’d like to say thanks for this GA website because I just realized that this website could really serve as an open space for witness and to bring our concerns, our voices to be heard not only by the Assembly participants but also by all SCM members around the world.

As for me when I am reflecting from the theme of this Assembly, “Your Sons and Daughters shall Prophesy “ I would say that this website is really a blessing which could serve as a space for not only prophesying but also a space of healing of my spiritual journey working in the ecumenical movement.

I would like to share some stories in which I found this General Assembly event became a space of healing and also reconciling.

Since the beginning of pre-women’s assembly that I attended until yesterday when I attended the Sunday service in the Wesley United Church, each element of the programs has worked in such a way to empower my self to be transformed, to be healed and to find a call or vision of reconciliation.

I understand that in the schedule of assembly there might not be enough space for personal struggle to be heard, although as Ms. Inger Lise said during pre-women’s assembly that there is no personal issue that has nothing to do with the larger socio-political-cultural context in our society.

So, I would say, once again BIG THANKS for the presence of this website.

During 1st day of the women’s pre-assembly there was nothing much I could do as I found myself trapped into the struggle of lacking confidence to speak, because English is not my mother tongue even in all countries around Asia continent. I hope that my other Asian sisters who attend this assembly would not have the same difficulty. But, if you have the same struggle, I would like to invite you to let be inspired by what Nancy Ruth, the senator said to us in the senate Chamber in 31 July 2008 : “Fear Not, women. Go Forward !”. I found this short phrase is really a powerful words, inspiring and to me it appears as a dream that Nancy Ruth has given to us as her young “daughters” or her junior friends. It was really an inspiring and wonderful moment for me to listen to her prophetic roles, I would say. Nancy said that she gives up, at the moment, with Christian spiritual stuff. But for me, she is just trying to live her faith in the alternative way and trying to prove that another way of living Christian faith is possible.

The spirit of creating an open space is something that I learned through SCM and it brings liberation and transformation for human beings. That’s what I learned from the Senator Nancy Ruth’s experience.

During the opening of the assembly, Rev. James Forbes through his keynote speech has given us one dream ( “that old men shall dream dreams”), that is creating a reality of continuing community in which reconciling communities could grow and prevail.

The presentation of Rev. Rubem Alves, the Brazilian theologian has also become an inspiring moment for me when he spoke about the dead body of Jesus. Eating the dead body of Jesus through the eucharist expressed our commitment to be part of Christ’s reconciling mission.

The Anglican evening service led by Rev. Gwenda Wells and Rev. Michael Wallace in 2nd August reflected the invitation of being part of God’s mission to reconcile the people and the whole creation. That invitation is very challenging to me but that is perhaps the beauty of being part of the prophetic call.

Then, on Sunday morning I went to the Wesley United Church which accepted the Gay, Lesbian, Bi-transgender people equally within the community. I was surprised with the call given by Rev. Heather, the church’s chaplain to share my experience in front of the congregation which served as a sermon in the liturgy. It was really a big surprise ! I was struggling to think what to say and how to speak ?

There were four of us who shared our stories in that church, namely Christopher Stacey(SCM UK), Max Karrasch (SCM Germany), Ms. Hannah Sarklow ( SCM Austria) and myself (SCM Indonesia). Until the last minute before I spoke I had planned to speak about the current issues or concerns that are happening in Indonesia right now. But, what came out from my mouth was something different that I didn’t really prepare to say. It was about the story of Indonesian’s military occupation for 24 years in East Timor which had brought a lot of painful, suffering of the Timorese people in which my father was also part of that military force. It was only through his funeral ceremony in June, 20, 2007 I came to know that my father had been given the task to occupy the Timorese land some years in the 70s and he had recieved an honour for what Indonesia’s military called “a heroic task”. I have been struggling to keep this story as a secret inheritance from my father since he died last year. But I found that keeping this secret inheritance is not liberating myself. It just brings me into another form of the oppression due to the wounded memory that confronting myself not only the memory of the brutal military aggression that took place in East Timor since 1975 until 1999 but also the memory of those who became victims under the Indonesian’s military occupation. I was struggling to reconcile both memories and wondering if I could do that ?
Through the speech or address given by resource persons in the beginning of Assembly, I felt that I was called to do something, to act here and now !
And I realized that my speaking the truth about my father’s story - in fact, the truth of the Indonesian military’s occupation in East Timor - in the Wesley United Church Canada became a space where I could do repentance on behalf of the dead body of my father and lament and seek the forgiveness so that I can be healed from the oppression due to the wounded memories of both the Timorese people’s suffering and the Indonesian imperialistic military’s regime.
It is a painful journey for me to speak this truth, but there is no other way I could do in order to be healed.

I really thank the Holy Spirit who guided me to attend the Wesley United Church and provided me space to be healed from the past wounded memory of my oppressive nation’s history.
And I would like to thank specially also to Drew, the Assembly’s steward from USA who made the space of speaking the truth possible to me. I believe that the Spirit has worked through him as well. The comfort hugs, pieces of tissues, sympathy and prayers I got from Drew Paton, Hannah Sarklow, Rev. Heather, Rev. Ellie Hummel (Ecumenical Chaplain Coordinator), other WSCF friends and the local congregations I believe became the real instruments of my healing process.

I’d like to end my reflection with the song:

COME NOW, O GOD OF PEACE, MAKE US ONE BODY
COME NOW OF JESUS, RECONCILE YOUR PEOPLE.

Montreal, Early morning _ August, 4th 2008

Photograph: Nina Nayoan (in front row with glasses)with the particpants of an SCM East Timor/MEC Timor Leste Peace camp in 2007. Nina has just completed a year working with the MEC Timor Leste, providing support and guidance with programmes and movement building as an FIM intern and an Indonesian SCM (GMKI)senior friend.